Three weeks ago I would have said that I know my kids deeply.

I think I was wrong.

Of course, like all parents, I know my kids. I know their patterns, their likes and dislikes, what makes them laugh and what scares them. I know what they like to read and their favorite spots to write and complete homework. I know the at-home and on-the-weekend and in-the summertime kids. .

I think I assumed I knew my kids as students. However, I’m realizing that I don’t know them, really know them, as students, like I am getting to know them now. How could I? They’ve spent the majority of their learning-selves at school. And, now, their learning-selves are at home. The difference at this point, is their learning-selves at home excludes one of the most important aspects of learning which is the social capital they receive from learning with and from peers.

Creating Learning-at-Home Rituals

For the past 2 weeks, I’ve been working to co-create rituals and routines with my kids so that they have things they can count on each day. We created shared agreements about when we would:

• Get up and get moving [9:30 a.m.]

• Join together at the breakfast table & get organized for the day [9:45 a.m.]

• Work through assignments posted online for each of their school classes [10:00-2:00 with lunch thrown in there somewhere]

• Unstructured refuel yourself time filled with choice activities such as art, backyard play time, trail walks, puzzles, gaming, etc. [2:00-3:00]

• “Mom School”, as my boys call it, where we spend time reading, writing and thinking together [3:00-4:30]

Kidwatching My Own Kids at Home

This pandemic has given me opportunities to study my own kids in new ways. I’m learning more about them each day as readers, writers, mathematicians, citizens, scientists, artists, siblings, chefs, gamers, backyard explorers, family members, comedians, and as dog-lovers. Through kidwatching, I’ve learned that one or more of my kiddos:

• has interest, stamina, and finds pleasure in paint-by-numbers

• uses cooking / dessert making at the 5:30 p.m. hour as celebration for completing all online assignments from school

• actually talks more during the dinner hour since the pace of our lives has slowed down a bit

• has learned to do a backflip on the trampoline and has taught the dog to jump on the trampoline too

• finds joy in beating his mom at a friendly game of trampoline COVID-19 basketball [formerly called HORSE]

• felt “cheated” out of book club time when we had a day where our schedule was a little clunky

• thinks our digital COVID-19 writing buddies experience might be kind of fun

When we first started learning at home together, I thought it was short term. I went into the what should we do to get through the next week or two mindset. Now that we have a clearer view that we’ll be going from short to longer-term, I decided to get my boys’ perspectives about who they think they are as learners — at school and at home. I gave my boys this Who Are You as a Learner note catcher.

To be honest, they weren’t sure what to do with it at first. I think it felt very school-like to them. I told them I wanted them to self-reflect about their interests, passions, curiosities, successes, habits, etc. so that I could think about them as learners in both environments. I’m not going to share their responses because they are for our work at home together, but one important point to mention is that we added ideas across several days. Like most kiddos, my boys started out reluctant about adding ideas. Maybe they felt vulnerable? Maybe they didn’t quite understand the purpose at first? Regardless, they needed more than one go at it before they started adding ideas that uncovered the deeper side of who they are as learners at school versus who they are as learners at home. Hint: Giving kiddos two post-it notes —one for ideas related to school and one for home — works great too!

Whether you are a parent at home who is educating your own kids OR an educator at home educating your students in their homes, I highly recommend giving kiddos an opportunity to reflect about who they are as learners — both at school and at home. Their responses just might shape your next moves as you provide the love and support they need as people and as learners during this time.